Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Slightly Depressed

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

I need to do something, I fucked up for nothing
...
Just set my heart on fire, like Gasoline. ♬

So, I'm slightly feeling depressed for the late couple months, and I don't know how to deal with it than just stay up all night and cry. basically.


Why do I feel like this?


I found a Major Depression, and they are:
  • Alcoholism and drug abuse
  • A history of child abuse
  • Family history of depressive disorders
  • Chronic stress and anxiety
  • Certain medications
  • A life-changing event; good or bad
  • Chronic illness, particularly terminal diseases
  • Obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety and panic disorders
  • Borderline personality disorder
  • Eating disorder

Uhm, my reasons are not that extreme. They are just:
  • Society? Mainstream.
  • School? Basic.
  • Parents? Oh.
  • The OCDs, and
  • Brain.
  • Fucking Brain.
  • My Brain.
  • My Fucking Brain.
  • ...

The repetitive thoughts that I can't escape are literally inevitable. I don't want this thoughts — it feels like an avalanche.



Why won't my brain just let me be happy?